If you don’t already practice loving yourself, getting started can be challenging. As my Valentine to you, here are some tips & resources for getting started:

• Read Mama Gena‘s blog post today highlighting Emily’s experience of becoming her own Valentine. This is a beautiful love story and full of lovely ideas that are easy to incorporate. Check out Mama’s other resources while you’re out there, and if you haven’t yet read it, her book is a must for all women.
• Are you a busy mom? Self care is often the very last thing a mother allows herself. Get yourself a copy of The Mother’s Guide to Self-Renewal and find (or gather) a Personal Renewal Group in your neighborhood. Renee Trudeau‘s compassionate resource has been a lifesaver for mothers.
• Do you love your work? Join Dr. Christiane Northrup, featured last week on Dr. Oz as an ‘Alternative Health Allstar‘ – on a special, free tele-gathering tomorrow night, talking about ‘What’s Love Got to Do With It?’ She’ll share how to use the most powerful force in the universe, LOVE, to build a business that is thriving, sustainable, and feels good to run. You’ll find out specific ways you can open your heart to increase your business success, and your bottom line.
• Speaking of bottom line, you know I just can’t stop talking about Barbara Stanny lately. And since working with her closely I now know more than ever the money IS love energy in the physical. I promise you, creating a loving relationship with your money will draw abundance in every single area of your life. Read her book, Overcoming Underearning, join her free Monthly Money Mondays, and if you’re in Austin, join my Vibrant Books circle next week to talk about how this work creates a full-spectrum life!
• One of the ways I most desire to love myself is to add more GREEN to my life. I’ve experimented with green smoothies and have found some of them to be quite refreshing, to the point where my body craves them. It feels really good when your body craves something good for it! With the help of Kris Carr‘s sexy new book Crazy Sexy Diet I’m exploring adding more (green) juice to my life this year.
• Last, and most importantly – gather your tribe you love you and support you 100% in loving yourself first. I highlighted my posse and the names of women whom I admire, wish to emulate, and have got my back, no matter what.

This is what’s top of mind for me at the moment. We all have unique ways of giving & receiving love. What are the expressions of love you most desire to receive? Tell me how you’ll be your own best Valentine this year!

“i heart me” photo by Allison Evans

VO: When you were a young girl, did you have an inkling of your future career as a Health Scientist and public speaker?

DK: When people used to ask me what I wanted to be when I grew up I had a standard answer, without blinking I would say, “I’m going to be a medical missionary movie star.” I hadn’t thought of this for ages and then a few years ago someone asked me this question and it came right back to me, because I used to say it all the time. And then I realized that I AM a medical missionary movie star! I was always drawn to the field of healing – so the ‘medical’ came from my dad being a doctor and my mom being a nurse. ‘Missionary’ because as a little girl I had such a zeal for spirit. I was the one In Sunday school who would always feel buzzing and tingly and feel compelled to ask questions. I always felt spirit moving in me and had a sense of a mission connected with it but not really to religion. In school I never took a speech class, I was never in drama, and never did anything that got me in front of people. But it turns out that now I do stand on stages, and my name is on the program. People ask for me to autograph my books, and they ask to have their picture taken with me. So in a way I kind of am a movie star too!

VO: Please tell us about your personal dance evolution.

DK: When I was little I would always put on these skirts that my grandmother made for me that twirled. Then I would put on a record of the can-can, and do it over and over again in the dining room, I loved it. In kindergarten I begged and begged to take ballet dance lessons. My mom took me, and I remember the teacher telling her (in front of me) in no uncertain terms, that I was much to large to dance. So I never got to take dance lessons. And I believed it, that I was much too large to dance. In fact I never did anything physical. In high school I was in the marching band so I didn’t have to take P.E. I chose a college that didn’t have a P.E. requirement, so I didn’t move even then, nothing. I had it in my head that I couldn’t do anything physical. Between college and my master’s program I lived overseas in Versailles, France as an Au Pair taking care of children. I gained 40 pounds there because I was really homesick, they treated me pretty poorly, and my only comfort was crème fraiche, pain au chocolat… When I came home for graduate school in 1980 I found myself sitting all the time studying, miserable, and overweight. Someone invited me to an aerobics class. I went and I was in tears of joy, it was like dancing! I was so happy. I started saving my money to take that class whenever I could. I had a Panasonic flip top cassette player, bought the cassette tape ‘Hooked on Classics’, booked a free racquetball court, and invited friends to come with me. I would teach them whatever I remembered from the aerobics class. We would do jumping jacks, knee lifts, etc. and pretty soon there were 15 friends from my MBA program coming. We formed a student organization so that we could get a bigger space for free. By that time I had learned more routines, had more cassettes, and I started charging a dollar a person so I could afford to take more classes and buy even more music. Pretty soon I earned enough money to buy a boom box, and I had about 50 people coming to my classes twice a week. I lost weight and was feeling great. For awhile I followed the aerobic thing and learned whatever came along. In 1989 I attended a fitness convention and had a free pass to attend a Nia class, which sounded strange to me. When I took it I had the experience of a really emotional release and I realized there was something more going on. I had had a miscarriage the year before; I had done talk therapy and was fine, I wasn’t crying anymore. But in the dancing, the moving of the pelvis released a lot of tears. I had a knowing then. I didn’t understand mind/body connection yet, but I knew that my body had just done something that it needed to. It was a huge experience of cleaning myself out, a release. I wanted to learn more about that, so I signed up for the teacher training. When I graduated with my PhD I took a semester off and lived at Satchidananda ashram to learn yoga lifestyle and how to teach Hatha yoga, where I became a certified yoga teacher. Over the years I also became certified in teaching Pilates mat classes. I love all those modalities.

VO: And now you teach the WiLD Dance Workout in Austin.

DK: WiLD stands for ‘Women in Love with the Divine’. I really love having a message or a theme in my classes. It feels almost like body church. It brings the potential of people to be conscious of spirit and their body at the same time. That’s why I created WiLD – so I could claim that that’s what the class is. Nobody will be surprised when they come in that I’m talking about life issues, or mentioning things that seem like they do not belong in a movement class. Because in fact, they do.

VO: You talk about the important of living an authentic, empowered, and joyful life. How do you do this?

DK: I practice pretty much everything that I preach. ‘Practice’ being the operative word, I’m not perfect at any of it. I have a daily morning ritual of prayer and body movement. Most of the time I use yoga as my physical practice, and I walk outside and do a lot of breathing. This keeps me connected to spirit in my body. I use a journal, for instance, writing down my intentions and desires and keeping track of them as they come true. And practicing gratitude, taking the time to really feel in my body how grateful I am that all of this is happening. This is how I practice staying connected to spirit which creates more joy. I am all about praise, love, gratitude. I‘m always looking for ways to expand the good that’s happening and refocus myself to the good. I practice this with my son Micah as well. When we catch ourselves complaining, to stop that habit, to make changes when we need to and to look for the good that’s happening. A long time ago I made a commitment to myself and it’s a practice I still have. Every year I study from someone that I admire, and often more than once a year. I’ve never missed a year since I finished my PhD. I KNOW the most valuable things that I know about, that I practice and I teach, are not the things I learned in conventional school. I learned different things in my MBA and my PhD programs. The things I’m using in actual practice that make a big difference in my life and in the lives of others, I’ve learned from studying with people I admire.

VO: Who are some of the people you admire and have learned from?

DK: In the early days, no doubt Dr. Christiane Northrup, Joan Borysenko, and Candace Pert really inspired me. Swami Satchidananda, Debbie and Carlos Rosas, Emilie Conrad. Paula Reeves for sure, she’s a body-centered Jungian analyst. Sister Maurus Allen and Sister Mary McGehee, the list goes on and on. Currently, its Caroline Muir and Joan and Thomas Heartfield, Doris Cohen, Gay Hendricks. I just met Patricia Moreno who has been in the fitness field as long as I have. I remember seeing her at the IDEA convention in 1986, back in the day when we were doing high impact aerobics. I don’t know her personally but just met her last week. What I witnessed from being in her presence is it was like looking in the mirror, the details are different but I can sense she has done what I’ve done. She’s continued to grow, she didn’t get stuck in 1986, she continued to seek out teachers and expand her influence. Others that influence me today are Abraham, Esther and Jerry Hicks, I listen to them all the time. Tim Cook, Barbara Marx Hubbard, Jean Houston. I think it’s a great question, because I seek out and surround myself with inspiring people. Jana Stanfield, Karen Drucker, Karen Wolfe, Penny Kirk. You inspire me! The women in my WiLd class inspire me. The people I work with in Team Northrup inspire me. I’ve created a life where I surround myself with people who inspire me. The people I’m in contact with regularly, daily, all inspire me. That’s the way to live your life!

VO: What can people look forward to at the ‘Dare to be Well’ event on September 26th?

DK: I want people to know that wellness is actually the brave choice. The easy way out is to complain, be negative, and to not feel really great. That is what the majority of Americans are doing right now. It’s easy to do that. But to dare to be well, it’s actually a courageous act to be happy and hopeful and to feel good. Because when you walk around that way, feeling happy, hopeful and feeling good, most people can’t relate to you that well! One purpose of the event is to support people in that. To help people realize that there are others who want this, and there is power in numbers. To even come to an event like this you’re going to be surrounded by people who want to buck the mainstream. They want to be happy, be hopeful, be healthy. I love to make what we know scientifically about mind/body/spirit connection (there is a lot) practical for people. To teach people how to use this in their lives in a practical way to create better health. Specifically, techniques to calm the mind, important things to know about nourishing the body like breaking the sugar/stress cycle, and how finances affect physical health. I’m really happy to have a chance to speak in my home town. It’s rare since I’m usually hired to speak out of state, far from home. It’s great to bring this to my own community. It’s a big desire of mine to co-create local community around wellness. When the current of the culture is going strongly toward the negative and the unhealthy, it’s much easier to have a whole group going in the same direction, creating health in community.

‘Dare to Be Well’ is at Austin’s Dougherty Arts Center Saturday, September 26 from 9 AM to 1 PM ~ hosted by Team Northrup Go to www.daretobewell.eventbrite.com to register

For more on Dr. Deb and the WILD dance workout schedule, see www.drdebkern.com

Links:
Dr. Christiane Northrup www.drnorthrup.com
Joan Borysenko www.joanborysenko.com
Candace Pert www.candacepert.com
Swami Satchidananda www.swamisatchidananda.org
Debbie and Carlos Rosas www.nianow.com
Emilie Conrad www.continuummovement.com
Paula Reeves www.personaltransformation.com
Sister Maurus Allen and Sister Mary McGehee www.shmon.org
Caroline Muir www.divine-feminine.com
Joan and Thomas Heartfield www.divine-feminine.com, and www.talkinghearts.com
Doris Cohen www.healingrepetition.com
Gay Hendricks www.hendricks.com
Patricia Moreno www.patriciamoreno.com
Abraham, Esther & Jerry Hicks www.abraham-hicks.com
Tim Cook www.consciousharmony.org
Barbara Marx Hubbard www.barbaramarxhubbard.com
Jean Houston www.jeanhouston.org
Jana Stanfield www.janastanfield.com
Karen Drucker www.karendrucker.com
Karen Wolfe www.drkarenwolfe.com
Penny Kirk www.teamnorthrup.com

Photo: me feeling cute at the beach in 1983

On a phone call with girlfriends last night we were sharing our desires for the future. One woman stated that it is her intention to be “healthy and cute” ~ which received peals of laughter and mutual understanding from the rest of us.

What a refreshing way to view wellness! I am always promoting health with moms, participants in womens circles, extended family, and others. Sometimes it feels like such a serious affair. But I also know that I cannot improve my health through studious and rigorous attention alone. If I want to really thrive, I’ve got to be having fun! If I want to have fun, I personally… want to feel CUTE.

And I like the word ‘cute’ for more than that. It doesn’t feel to me to be the same as fashionable, or dressed-up, necessarily. Cute, to me, is reflection of how I feel in my body. I can feel cute in an old pair of jeans and tank top if the right music is playing and I’m bopping along. I can feel cute in an outdated dress from the 2005 Target collection if I’m enjoying a fun conversation with someone. And I suspect if I pay more attention, more of the time, to feeling cute… the healthy part will follow.

In 2002 I participated in my first women’s circle. It was about four weeks after getting married (for the second time) and around four weeks prior to becoming pregnant with my daughter (second pregnancy). Sitting among the circle of women from various life stages and circumstances changed my life for good. This particular women’s circle was my introduction to setting intentions, creative expression as a method of gaining clarity, meditation, and communicating with other women at a depth I had not yet experienced.

I was hooked. The long weekend helped me nurture, respect, and follow my intuition, which eventually led to a significant career change which has continued to blossom and bring vibrancy to my life. I began to partner with friends to host reunions of our initial circle experience. I strongly encouraged other women to find similar communities of support. I launched a career coaching business and began to take notes on the book I planned to someday write. And then I was introduced to Renee Peterson Trudeau and her book, The Mother’s Guide to Self Renewal. I stayed up all night just to finish this book, I was so excited by what I read! Within weeks I met Renee, we became friends, and I started facilitating women’s circles called Personal Renewal Groups, using Renee’s Guide to inform our conversation.

For two years now I’ve facilitated PRG’s, and continued to expand my communities of supportive women in my friendships, business and personal endeavors, and personal and spiritual growth. I give the Guide as gifts to clients, friends and family; and encourage them to reference certain chapters or journal topics for assistance with the everyday issues they face as women and as mothers in our 21st century culture.

This Mother’s Day weekend, Renee is launching ‘Live Inside Out’ – promoting the idea that ‘our inner life should be as rich as our outer life’ by living with intention, practicing self-care, coming from a place of peace rather than fear, and responding rather than reacting to life’s normal fluctuations and disturbances.

Present Time!! (Blue’s Clues reference, anyone?) This Mother’s Day weekend, for 48 hours, Renee is making her entire book available for FREE download. This is a beautiful 180 page workbook that you will read and journal through many times over, whether you’re a young mom, grandmother, or a single woman with a demanding career. If you crave strategies for balance, you will find them here! I personally keep 2 copies on hand, and have written through them many times over. Because… as my balance and the quality of my life improves, there continue to be new situations in which I desire clarity, and the book always helps me.

I wish you each Peace, Balance, Wellness, and a Happy Mother’s Day!

Maddy